I slammed the envelope and official letter down on my countertop in utter disgust.

My township chose to bring our quarterly taxes up, not by $50, not by $100 or even $150 – we were raised by a staggering $300 every quarter going forward. And that wasn’t even the final insult. The raise was a preliminary one. The new bill to be paid for the last part of the year is $100 more. So, essentially, we have a $400 increase.

It’s not even like there’s been an improvement in the town. It’s a simple place, semi-rural really. It’s not like we need or now have more police officers or streetlamps. And there are times when the garbage trucks skip a week. So I don’t know what this ginormous tax levy is for (I mean, it could be for something important that I don’t know about but I need to see it first).

I swear y’all, this is a perfidious money grab – that’s all this is.

Everything now is a post-apocalyptic, dystopian society, cannibalistic money grab lol! And it’s designed to make strong productive people grow tired. How long is it going to be before I grow weary and shrug off the clothing veneers of polite society? How much more will it take before I put on my post-apocalyptic hunter gatherer black leather jacket and disengage myself from civilization – like Mad Max….or more precisely…Mad Mike? πŸ˜‚

(Not really sure if I can aura-match 1979 Mel Gibson and the successive Mad Max films…but my black leather jacket fits pretty well on me, I guess.)

I can only endure so much taxation levies before I myself succumb to the post World War Eleven desolation that has claimed the free world πŸ˜‚

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43 responses to “We Don’t Need Another Hero! We Don’t Need To Know The Way Home! All We Want Is Life Beyond….The Thunderdome AKA Please! Stop Raising Our Property Taxes!”

  1. vermavkv Avatar

    This is a wonderfully entertaining piece of everyday frustration turned into comedy! πŸ˜‚ What begins with the very real shock of a $400 tax increase quickly transforms into a hilarious journey toward Mad Max territory.

    I particularly enjoyed the progression from β€œWhy has my tax gone up?” to β€œHow long before I abandon civilization and become Mad Mike?” That leap is what gives the post its charm. The frustration is genuine, but instead of simply complaining, you turn it into a wonderfully exaggerated dystopian fantasy.

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      Vijay i am glad you enjoyed it πŸ˜‚

      as you know from your experience, taxes are omnipresent. one might as well draw humor from it!

  2. CJ Antichow Avatar
    CJ Antichow

    Mike cmon there’s no point in complaining about death and taxes 😬🀭

    1. Ana Daksina Avatar

      Bitchin’ relieves the SOUL! 🀣

      1. CJ Antichow Avatar
        CJ Antichow

        You’re right, it is good to get it out!

        1. Ana Daksina Avatar

          πŸ’ͺπŸ‘πŸ˜†

          1. Michael Williams Avatar

            let’s go to city hall together Ana and let them know what we’re really about! lol πŸ™‚

            1. Ana Daksina Avatar

              Oh, that’ll work. I’ll read them a nice poem, and after that.. 🀣

    2. Michael Williams Avatar

      i know right??? it seems like taxes are more omnipresent than death at times lol.

      i don’t know Ceej, i’m starting to like this socialism utopia stuff more and more πŸ˜‚

      1. CJ Antichow Avatar
        CJ Antichow

        I guess maybe it’s because I’m Canadian Mike, taxes are so regular and part of everyday life πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™€οΈ
        We lose nearly half our paychecks to income tax!

        1. Michael Williams Avatar

          😭😭😭😭

  3. Nancy Homlitas Avatar

    Whenever our home values are reassessed, our taxes increase. Most of our taxes go to the schools. Have you tried appealing your property tax assessment? I empathize with your frustration, Mike. πŸ™

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      sadly, i have Nancy. in a lot of ways, i can understand why property taxes need to be raised. it’s just frustrating at times. and I know, because of family friends and old connections, it is a big issue in your neck of the woods too! in fact, it’s a massive issue throughout the state and I don’t blame anyone for balking at any increase.

      1. Nancy Homlitas Avatar

        What’s infuriating is when they gave the go-ahead for the state lottery, it’s funds were supposed to be earmarked for the schools. πŸ€”

        1. Michael Williams Avatar

          oh my gosh! that’s horrible!

  4. Lori Pohlman Avatar

    My goodness! That is indeed a very large increase!

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      thank you Lori! it IS significant!

      it’s the type of significant where one would be prompted to dress up in…like…native american indian garb to go and push….maybe….tea boxes out of ships into a harbor

      πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ ok, maybe not, but you get it lol. happy friday!

  5. Tom Darby Avatar
    Tom Darby

    Taxation is theft!

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      i swear to God/Allah/Bhudda it really is.

      like…i don’t mind participating in the system but in recent years, you really have to wonder where your withholdings are being applied to. this is no longer warm cheese-bread-with bacon bits theory, this is cold economics and accountability.

  6. KikiFikar Avatar

    Vent away my friend! $1600 a year is up there…says the girl who lives in the highest taxed county in the country (with zero to show for it thank you very much).

    It’s disgusting! I love a great Mad Max tie in though!!

  7. Michael Williams Avatar

    yes! exactly Kiki! like…we all just need good town maintenance and police…we’re not trying to send our local racoon population to Yale πŸ˜‚

    and yes, everytime there is dysfunction and savage improriety Mad Max must be summoned, only he can save us lol
    Happy Friday!

  8. Hazel Avatar

    My friend said that she’ll go in the woods, live in the cottage and talk to animals. 🀭 Can we run away with all this surprising taxes? All the best, Kuya Mike.

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      i support her! 🀣🀣

      1. Hazel Avatar

        Me, too😁

  9. justrojie Avatar

    omg i’m so annoyed with the hoa and property taxes going up!! and where does it go anyway??

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      ikr??? i swear if i see a council member driving around in a new mercedes here, i’m going to walk up to them and tell them to give me a ride back and forth to like…Whole Foods or something lol

      1. justrojie Avatar

        why could i totally see you as a council member for the HOA??

        1. Michael Williams Avatar

          hahaha! πŸ˜€

  10. Scott Avatar

    YES!, Mike. The way you put it is funny, but it’s very, very true!

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      thank you Scott! they don’t understand the philosophy of the Road Warrior lol.

  11. ibarynt Avatar

    Mike, we are taxed to death while everything around us is in shambles. Complaining just causes one heartburn 😁. We even have a cleanliness tax but the country..
    Only our wallets and pockets are cleaned πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ.

  12. ibarynt Avatar

    Oooh I’m sure you can give Mel Gibson a run for his money πŸ˜‹

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      I know right Iba? they have all these taxes for things and yet, things mostly stay the same! and you are so right that complaining about it just gives heartburn lol. oh gosh, what can we do?

      we may very well have to become Mad Maxes lol

      1. ibarynt Avatar

        I think it won’t be long before we find our inner Mad Max. Food prices here seem to go up every week. Milk will be up by Rs.9 from September 😱… my language is changing to 🀬🀬🀬🀣

    2. Michael Williams Avatar

      I like to think I can give 1979 Mel Gibson a run for his money 😁😁😁

  13. Betty Avatar

    Mike, I completely understand your frustration β€” that kind of tax increase would make anyone want to reach for the black leather jacket and become Mad Max for a day! πŸ˜„

    It’s even harder when the town doesn’t seem to show where all that extra money is actually going.

    You turned a very stressful situation into such a funny, relatable read! Hoping some clarity β€” and accountability β€” comes your way soon! πŸ™βœ¨

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      πŸ˜€ thanks Betty – i figure since taxes are such an omnipresent part of our lives, we might as well draw some humor out of it.

      1. Betty Avatar

        You’re welcome, Michael! I agree!πŸ˜‚

  14. Mj Buck Avatar

    Wow, that’s crazy! Seems like such an injustice.I’d be very frustrated too. I also loved Mad Max growing, lol.

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      it really was MJ. i was surprised and talked with my neighbors – they, too, did not like the tax hike.

      funny thing about Mad Max, i watched Mad Max 2 and Thunderdome some time ago and it still looks like a million dollar blockbuster despite it being in the early 80’s. Amazing!

  15. Joey Jones Avatar
    Joey Jones

    😲

    1. Michael Williams Avatar

      right?! taxes suck lol πŸ˜€

  16. […] As y’all know, I’ve been tearing my hair off of my scalp because of my new property taxes. […]

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